A recipe for Disaster
by moonlight-pixy
Summary: LJ: "This recipe is an easy to follow, step-by-step guide to creating the ULTIMATE DISASTER". Who else other than Lily and James could cause the disaster? please R&R! happy new year everyone!


**Hey guys!**

**I know it's been a while, but my laptop was taken off me so I had no internet access.**

**This is just a little something I've had in my head for a while, it's weird, it's random, it's not very good, but I decided to write it up and share it with you guys. Please let me know what you think :D**

**Just a little (or rather a BIG) thank you to: YOU, the readers of course, for making it worth my while by writing reviews (lovely or not they are always appreciated) and especially to the loyal ones (you know who you are. I love you guys soooooooooo much), and to my awseome beta reader crushed lily-flower, who takes the time to beta, even though she doesn't have much time on her hands. I love you guys all so much and really hope that you a brilliant new year! Hope to see/hear from you then**

**HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**luv you so much**

**xoxoxoxoxoxoxox....**

**pixy**

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_**"**Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel - Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig ina wig"_

_HP and the Philosopher's Stone page 21 chapter 2_

**A recipe for Disaster**

This recipe is an easy to follow step-by-step guide to creating the ULTIMATE DISASTER! Most of the ingredients can only be found at Hogwarts school for Witchcraft and Wizardry. If the ten easy steps are not followed exactly, and measurements of ingredients are not precise, the recipe will not achieve its maximum effect (Individual Results may vary, also depending on the previous moods of characters involved).

Please note that although this experiment has been conducted countless times (in slightly different scenarios, all involving James Potter and Lily Evans) it sill posses a great amount of danger. Everything is at own risk, an no responsibility will be taken for the injuries or death of your person.

Ingredients:

**One misunderstood situation for which you will need the following:**

Sirius Black

Severus Snape

And both of their fists

**Lily Evans (in order for her character to be most effective for this situation you will need the following ingredients):**

A great amount of dislike for James Potter (depending on how disastrous you want the disaster to be you may alter the amount slightly. Please be aware that by going overboard in this particular ingredient your chance of getting out of the situation alive decreases rapidly)

A big pinch of temper

A reasonable quantity of hard headedness

Her wand

(the rage needed will be a natural by product)

**James Potter (in order for his character to be the most effective for this situation you will need the following ingredients):**

A healthy amount of denial

His vocabulary of swear words (PG is recommended if the vocabulary is not altered)

A few drops of self protection

His wand

**General:**

Nasty spells such as:

Locomotor Mortis (Leg Locker)

Rictusempra (Tickling)

Tarantallegra (legs out of control in a type of quickstep)

Engorgio (swells things)

Furnunculus (boils)

Densaugeo (big teeth)

IMPORTANT: Common sense MUST be removed when indicated

Preperation;

**Step 1: **Prepare misunderstood situation by creating a fist fight between Sirius Black and Severus Snape (this should be easy as they have a very, _very_ strong dislike for each. Simply put them in the same room), which James Potter will try to break up.

**Step 2: **Enter Lily Evans while Potter is wrestling Snape, trying to keep him away from Black.

**Step 3: **Add the dislike for Potter, the temper and hard headedness to Lily Evans and stir up well.

**Step 4:** Beat the denial into James Potter.

**Step 5:** Bring Evans to a simmer then boil and bubble with rage, as Potter insists that he did nothing wrong.

**Step 6:**Add swear words to Potter's vocabulary as Evans draws her wand (remove Black and Snape from the heart of the fire to avoid them from getting burned).

**Step 7:** Make Potter's temper flare up when Evans' first spell catches him off guard (you may insert any of the spells/hexes and jinxes mentioned above).

**Step 8:** Inject minimal amount of self protection into Potter, which causes him to also draw his wand.

**Step 9:** Now remove any lingering common sense (the amount may be so minimal, it could be difficult to extract) from the mixture, and replace it with more several nasty spells.

**Step 10**:Lastly, take a step back to admire the ULTIMATE DISASTER you have created.

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**HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! **

**please review :D**

**luv**

**xoxox**

**pixy**

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